Comments on: Controlling Girlfriend or Independence?

By: uknowme

uknowme — Mon, 28 Dec 2009 23:52:59 +0000

I don’t think controlling or independent apply here. I think fear is the factor. I don’t blame her, Newark is a hole. Whether she lives with you or not aren’t you concerned about yourself let alone her visiting or leaving your neighborhood at night? I had a bf who didn’t like where I was moving to simply because of the distance and we ended it. I had to consider that in order to buy a house I had to leave the area and wasn’t going to not buy a house which is a long term investment to keep a relationship that wasn’t anywhere near a commitment. In one way I could have looked at as control because he would have rather I lived near him in an apt w/ my pets than I make an investment in a house that could allow my pets to run free in give me control of my environment. In your case I don’t think it’s the same though. If you can find a different location in your price range then why not?
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By: Ella

Ella — Mon, 28 Dec 2009 23:36:59 +0000

Personally I would go for the apartment. It seems to me that your girlfriend is being pretty melodramatic and besides breaking up with someone over where they live is a pathetic reason; sounds like you'd be better being well shot of her.
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By: JJMcIntosh

JJMcIntosh — Mon, 28 Dec 2009 23:27:59 +0000

Does she have a reason to be so afraid of the place you are thinking of renting? If so, then she has a right to be the way she is about it. If it is not as bad as she is making out to be, then she is way out of line with this. If she refuses to visit you where ever you go, then she does not care to see you enough as she should. I would walk through fire in order to see my hunny. However, there are places in town that I will not go bc you do not know if you are going to get shot just for driving on a certain street. If the town is really bad, then look for another place. If it is not that bad, then go ahead and get it and be happy. I figure, if she loves you enough, then it doesn't matter where you go, she will still come visit you. She does sound like she is actually afraid of the place though. If so, you should rethink things. You being the man, you are responsible to care for her and make sure she is safe.
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By: barnaby_362003

barnaby_362003 — Mon, 28 Dec 2009 22:37:59 +0000

Good grief! Grow a backbone for God's sake! Its your life not hers. Make the move and forget about her. Just be fortunate enough to find out what sort of person she was after 2 months instead of a longer period of time.
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By: James H

James H — Mon, 28 Dec 2009 22:09:59 +0000

Get a new girlfriend. If you let her sway you now she will never stop.
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By: LUDWIG WITTGENSTEIN

LUDWIG WITTGENSTEIN — Mon, 28 Dec 2009 21:38:59 +0000

Man if you are not even aloud to have choices that only effect you now. what will it be like if you marry this girl. Cut her loose and tell her why!
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By: treatau

treatau — Mon, 28 Dec 2009 21:06:59 +0000

controlling girl friend tell her to get over it, i think theres more to it than shes leading on perhaps she knows someone close by or she may be jelouse of the fact your moving into a place where there may be quite few girls around and she wont be the only one
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By: angel h

angel h — Mon, 28 Dec 2009 20:49:59 +0000

good god move on and deal.
Is she paying the rent? Mortgage? nah I dun think so.
And I am sure you would not let her roam the streets on her own if the crime is so bad.
she is just being a baby and if you give into her once she will do it again.
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By: Prem

Prem — Mon, 28 Dec 2009 20:29:59 +0000

drink a glass of cool water and think…and decide…because girlfriend is yours…
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By: Kishimojun

Kishimojun — Mon, 28 Dec 2009 20:12:59 +0000

Keep the apartment, get a better girl. You DO NOT want years of your life spent trying to please an unreasonable person, do you?
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